I haven't had much to say this week. Ethan still has a cold. The snot just keeps on flowing. How Dylan hasn't had it I will never know. I am just glad that it is only 1 kid though. Only this one kid is whiny enough for 2...or 3. Yesterday was my day to be with Dylan in his class. I left a crying Ethan with Ryan's mom. I always dread that part. The kid needs to learn that it is ok to be unattached from his mother. And that she will come back...eventually! So things went ok in class. It seemed to be a bit chaotic through the day. All of the kids seemed extra hyper and wild. Must have been something in the air. There was a moment during free play when Dylan spazzed out. Just knocked over a container of stuff for no reason and it certainly was NOT an accident. After that incident, one of the teachers told me its been happening from time to time. That during free play he will do something that he knows he shouldn't, but does it anyway. She said that during structured activities he is fine, but during free play it can happen.
He does this here at home. Has for quite sometime. Like a year or two. I just never have been able to figure out how to stop it. Here, he spazzes out when he thinks I'm not watching him or cant see him. He will knock things over, push Ethan, or even kick the dog. He just plain acts out. I catch him every time, but I don't know how to stop it. And now that it is starting at school, I am really at a loss. I feel awful, or feel like I am failing as a parent. I don't know how to make him stop doing things like that when he thinks he can get away with it. He never does get away with it. Here or at school. Does anyone have any ideas???
I will just leave the post at that. If you have some advice, email it or leave a comment. I could use any help you can offer.
Hey hun...I found you on mommy bloggers. First I have to say I always feel like I am failing as a parent when I don't know what to do. So do not feel bad BC I am sure you are not a failing parent. I would say to be strong and take away something from him. Look for a currency.
ReplyDeleteFrom the super nanny, I give a warning..after that I put him in time out. I do the time in minutes according to the age (ex:: 3 years old, 3 mins)
You have to be strong. A working mother is exhausted and just gives in or gives light punishment bc we do not have the strength. We want to hug them and kiss them and hate that it is our child we are getting the complaints about, or is my son causing someone else a headache. Keep your head up. He will see that you are not playing and mean serious business. Give it two weeks and of course always remember to applaud him when he does well.
"Dylan you did well today, you did not do so and so, I think you can have an extra 10 minutes with your favorite toy"
Hope I helped
www.undecidedmama1329.com
Thank you. I appreciate the kind words and especially the advice. I guess I need to be a little better about rewarding the good, and not be so focused on ONLY punishing the bad.
ReplyDeleteI only have a little 20 month old so I can't really tell you advice from experience but I think what Mirn said is really good. Focus on the good and he might not feel the need to act out as much. He also might need some extra discipline...I learned that recently myself. good luck! Let us know if you find a way to help him!
ReplyDelete--Sandy
www.AsToldByMommy.blogspot.com
It's easy to get discouraged but he will grow out of this stage. It sounds like he is trying to gain your attention. I would talk to him and target his emotions. Find out how he is feeling. Tell him that Mommy loves him but gets dissapointed when he misbehaves. If he is feeling sad or wants to express himself, words are the best way. Tell him his actions are making you very sad and how would he feel if you made him sad. Of course discipline is very important and I am a big fan of time outs but it sounds like there is something deeper here he is trying to tell you. Stay patient, know you are a great mom and you will get through this. You should check out my blog because many articles I have written deal with this. http://www.mommymasters.blogspot.com. I also just wrote a guest blog article at http://www.darcyandbrian.com/2011/11/10/guest-post-what-makes-you-a-mommy-master/ that will inspire you. Keep us all posted. Hope to see you on my blog and feel free to contact me or reach out on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/mommymasters. I hope that helps.
ReplyDeleteoh man this breaks my heart! :( he might be doing it for attention. my oldest did this after we brought owen home from the hospital. he eventually grew out of it (don't remember how we handled it though). hugs to ya momma! :)
ReplyDeleteThanks ladies. It means a lot. I am taking all your advice to heart and will give it a shot. I do believe part of it is for attention. I guess that all goes back to "needing to focus MORE on the good" part of it all.
ReplyDeleteWe will try! Thank you all.